Something weird happened this week.
When purchasing clothing for my son I made a conscious effort to purchase pieces that were relatively gender neutral in concept; think grey hoodies, simple pants, and plain t-shirts. I wanted to only buy clothes once with the hope I might have a girl.
Fast-forward two years, and we have our baby girl and this relatively decent sized stash of clothing.
I’ve sorted and purged. I’ve donated and sold the clothing that was “too boy” (whatever that means) and kept the clothes I thought were just right.
One of these pieces is a pink polo shirt.
We aren’t afraid of dressing boys/men in pink. My husband looks great in pink, and so does my son. They also rock purple AMAZING.
In times past, when my son wears his purple pants or his pink shirts, he has been mistaken as a girl. But, whatever. He’s just a kid.
And then earlier this week, I dressed my daughter in a ‘boys’ pink polo shirt.
No big deal. It’s just clothing.
But I feel weird about it. Why the fuck do I feel weird about dressing my daughter in my sons pink polo shirt? Maybe it’s the lingering anxiety of my Zoloft-gone-bad, but it’s probably this weird societal pressure to dress my children in their matching gender.
They are just kids.
Kids clothing has been a struggle of my existence since becoming a mother. I’m constantly frustrated and irritated by the lack of clothing options for children that represent childhood.
I was mildly irritated as a boy mom. Frustrated with the constant smear of sports and moustaches, I just wanted to buy solids. Now as a girl mom, I find myself in a place of desperation.
Don’t get me wrong; I love to dress my girl in dresses and rompers. They make summer time easy breezy. But when it comes to the basic wardrobe staples (t-shirts, diaper shirts/onsies, pants and jammies), I’m frustrated.
I’m tired of every shirt having a bow and every bum having a ruffle. I want boy and girl sleepers to zip up the same leg, and pants that can fit over her jumbo baby thighs. I want to break traditional colour schemes and
So here I am, a self proclaimed crusader for gender-neutral clothes for children, and I find myself self-conscious about my daughter wearing a boys pink polo shirt. I have spent more time this week fretting over this moment than I care to admit and that bothers me.
It reinforces how baby girls clothing is cut and built differently (despite having the same bodies). It reinforces my desire to conform to societal expectations of my children genders, and opens my eyes about my own bias and tendencies. In such, I’m not proud of myself and feel lost and confused.
So, give me grace, and I will give you grace. We are all mothers fumbling thru the same journey of raising little people. I want to raise little people with confidence, and this week I struggled with this societal and cultural expectation of my children. It bugs me.
Talk to me about your journey in dressing your children and providing them with options that represent them as little humans. Drop me a link of your favourite brand of clothing that dresses kids as kids, and don’t forget to check out this hashtag on instagram.